Through Cleaning Comes Freedom

Spring is a wonderful time of year! I love the sunshine and the fresh flowers found in abundance! I love that Spring symbolizes a new start in life. So, it seems that everyone starts their spring cleaning on the first sunny weekend! Yesterday was the perfect day for spring cleaning. The sun was out, the temperature was warm, the birds were singing.

I completed a Spring Cleaning of my own. It wasn't the normal house cleaning: the dusting, vacuuming, mopping, etc. My spring cleaning was an internal cleaning of junk I've been trying to get rid of for several months. My reasoning for cleaning it out was I seemed not to move past what was there. Mister E tired of my constant emotional problems that all linked back to this one area.

It took a lot of strength I thought I didn't have to rid my life of the junk. At first, I relied on Mister E for strength to delete memory triggers from my life, but I soon realized that I needed to find the strength myself to cleanse my life. Yesterday, I sat down and purged my email, pictures, and music of memory triggers. I hadn't realized how holding onto those things were causing me more problems than not.

Sorting through those items was really tough. I'm joyfully surprised I was able to finish without any assistance. The pain of the memories was more than I care to admit. I didn't realize how many memories and feelings I had suppressed over the last several months. I wrote down all the memories and whatever thoughts and feelings came to mind, filling pages with it all.

Finally when the last email was deleted, I knew letting this junk go could be accomplished with one simple yet hard task. I went to Mister E's house for his assistance in completing my objective. I read aloud the venting I had written down from the day so that I could admit to myself the truth and pain of those memories. Mister E quietly listened as I let everything melt away, and when all was done, he helped me burn the last remnants of those memories and experiences.

At last, I was FREE!!! I was free from the pain, the memories, the emotion, the regret, the weight of carrying that junk around with me! I was no longer being strangled by what I couldn't change. I was free to be myself again, to move forward with my life, to discover what new paths are ahead. The smile on my face could not have been any bigger. I became a feather floating on a cloud of happiness. Life was my own again!

I can't tell you how wonderful it is to be rid of that junk. It is only through the Lord's mercy that I am free. It was His strength I needed to rely on before I could truly let go of what I held on to. It is amazing what the Lord can do with a simple girl like me, who makes mistakes and is far from perfect. Yet, He loves me and is there to help whenever I need Him and even when I feel I don't.

I love life, don't you?

A Peek at Provo!

I'm spending my spring break in Utah. For most of my break, I'm staying with my brother and his family, but last weekend I saw my Triad friends in Provo. Let me tell you, I love Provo! I am so excited to move there soon. I feel as though I can grow so much by being in Provo.

I'll be living and sharing a room with my friend, Hungry. I'm really looking forward to the chance to spend time with her again. I've missed her the last six months! It was great to preview the apartment I'll be living in and the ward I'll be attending. I thought you'd like to preview the apartment, too.

I had the chance to tour Utah Valley University (UVU) while I was there. UVU is in Orem and is about fifteen minutes away from where I'd be living. I can't say I absolutely love UVU, but it's a good school. It has a good music program and a good nursing program. It will certainly be a big and hard change to move out of the house and away from home, but I know it is what I need to do. The Lord has a plan for me. I can't see all of what it is, but I am given glimpses every now and then.

Here I Come A-Planning

As you may have guessed, I am a planner. I am constantly looking ahead at where I am going next. I'll tell everyone what my plan is, and then, lo and behold, the plan changes. With all my changing of plans, I have driven my parents nuts. They even have started teasing me about having a "plan of the day, hour, week..."

There is a new plan in the works with a lot of new and exciting things happening! I won't spoil it by saying what it is because it will change if I do. Just know it's involves a few BIG changes!!!

Paka

Lessons in Self-Control

Ah, self-control... How horrible and wonderful it is at the same time. I've found that a lot of my challenges of late have been in self-control. Some have been self-inflicted tests of my self-control.

Last week, I cut all desserts from my diet. Let me tell you that that was hard- especially when Dad brought home the brownies from Costco! Man, I almost gave in right then and there. I held strong until Mister E took me out to lunch and was disappointed that he wouldn't be able to order cheesecake for dessert. Seriously, the man can talk me into almost anything!

Speaking of Mister E, we decided to take a break from dating for a while. It's a long complicated story that even he and I don't fully understand. So, I won't bore you with all the details. However, I want to say that sitting next to him while he was so downtrodden without throwing my arms around him to comfort him was THE hardest test of my self-control. To watch him struggle and be weighed down with the world almost tore me apart knowing there wasn't anything I could do to help. I can only attribute the strength in self-control I had last night to the Lord. It is only through Him that I had the ability to refrain from hugging him till every care of the world left.

I've come to know that through the Lord, we gain strength that we wouldn't ordinarily have. We must rely on His ever out-stretched arm for guidance and support through life's many paths. It is through our practice of self-control while relying on the Lord that we ultimately overcome the natural man and become as our Father in heaven.

Proposals 101

When proposing to a lady, there are several factors to take into consideration.

1) There must be a girl.


2) There must be a guy.


3) There must be a ring (a proper fit is helpful).


4) It's all about location, location, location!!!
Here are a few examples.

The beach is always a nice setting, with the waves providing soothing natural music.

A deserted parking lot provides a secluded spot for dancing after she says yes.

A converted railroad bridge can enhance the sweet moment of surprise.

The hilltop overlooking the city is the perfect place to enjoy a post-proposal kiss.

The ideal place to propose is a place where the girl is least likely to suspect it- such as, my personal favorite...

The Ice Cream Aisle in Safeway!!!

Caution: If choosing to propose in a store...

choose your aisle carefully. Some aisles are more photogenic than others!

(I.E. Not the toilet seat aisle.)

However you choose to propose, remember to have fun!

Many thanks to my fellow Joy School Alum for enjoying such a fun and proposal-filled St. Valentine's Day!

***No proposals were accepted in the making of this post. ***

Picky-Picky: No Longer Just a Cat

I've noticed that I have friends who are either the pickiest eaters ever or are willing to eat anything. (Myself, I fall somewhere in the middle. I am picky about some things, but I always stand by my rule to try something twice.) It still amazes me how picky some eaters are.

What brought this subject to mind is the self-given task of cooking dinner next week for Mister E and I. He is the kind of person who will eat anything- and probably already has! Last week, he discovered that hot sauce on a glazed doughnut was very tasty. Being the adventurous girl that I am, I tried it with him... and loved it!!! I may never eat a plain glazed doughnut again without hot sauce!

I asked Mister E what he'd like to have for our dinner next week, and his answer gave no help of narrowing down recipe choices. So, I'm back to thumbing through recipe magazines my mom has collected over the years searching for a good meal for two. Any suggestions?

Cupckes and Games

This entire weekend has been a ball of fun. I finally released a lot of the things weighing down my life, so I was able to enjoy a carefree weekend of fun and games!

Friday night, I volunteered at the annual Jazz Festival for my college. I enjoyed working back stage so much, and I made some new friends that I otherwise wouldn't have. The joke going around was that I turned down a date to work the festival. It is a little stretched from the truth, but only by a little. You can fill in the real story yourself. :)

Saturday turned out to be a sweet day- literally. I put my spoon to the bowl and made beautifully white cupcakes for my family celebration that evening. I'm quite proud of how they turned out. The batter was evenly dispersed, and the cupcakes were a beautiful white inside. I've always been fond of separating the egg yokes from the whites. Other than licking the spoon, separating eggs is my favorite task in baking a white cake.

The family festivities were great! The fun started when Roadrunner, in his six year old way, snubbed me for my good friend, Mister E. Seriously, I had to request a hug from Roadrunner! It's like I wasn't even there!! Oh well. I guess that means Roadrunner likes Mister E. The girls soon ganged up against Mister E and started a pillow fight. There were times when I thought for sure the kids would win- four against one. Then, I realized the kids didn't know what they were up against!

By the time dinner was ready, I believe the score was 3-1 with Mister E in the lead.

After dinner, we played Apples to Apples, and I about died with laughter. That game is so fun and amusing! I love it- almost as much as Charades! When we were tired of that game, we moved on to Scotland Yard, a family favorite. Dad was the elusive "Mr. X" while the rest of us were the detectives. It was a tough and intense game. My brother and Mister E certainly made Dad sweat a little wondering if he would be caught- which he wasn't.

The evening was such a great night! It was probably one of the most enjoyable family nights I've had in a while. It was certainly something to write home about!


Sunday presented itself as another awesome Sabbath. Church was uplifting- despite a throbbing headache. Sunday School was very inspiring, as was Relief Society. As always, I enjoyed my ward's Break the Fast meal after church and ate more than I probably should have. I loved learning how to play Garbage Rummy with Mister E's family. I was terrible, earning 370 points in four rounds! However, as bad as I was, it was only my first time playing the game. I'm sure I'll improve with a little more practice.

As I said at the beginning, this was a fantastic weekend! I'd certainly love to relive all the fun spent with family and friends time and time again. Here's to the start of a wonderful week and a new month!

Paka