Through Cleaning Comes Freedom

Spring is a wonderful time of year! I love the sunshine and the fresh flowers found in abundance! I love that Spring symbolizes a new start in life. So, it seems that everyone starts their spring cleaning on the first sunny weekend! Yesterday was the perfect day for spring cleaning. The sun was out, the temperature was warm, the birds were singing.

I completed a Spring Cleaning of my own. It wasn't the normal house cleaning: the dusting, vacuuming, mopping, etc. My spring cleaning was an internal cleaning of junk I've been trying to get rid of for several months. My reasoning for cleaning it out was I seemed not to move past what was there. Mister E tired of my constant emotional problems that all linked back to this one area.

It took a lot of strength I thought I didn't have to rid my life of the junk. At first, I relied on Mister E for strength to delete memory triggers from my life, but I soon realized that I needed to find the strength myself to cleanse my life. Yesterday, I sat down and purged my email, pictures, and music of memory triggers. I hadn't realized how holding onto those things were causing me more problems than not.

Sorting through those items was really tough. I'm joyfully surprised I was able to finish without any assistance. The pain of the memories was more than I care to admit. I didn't realize how many memories and feelings I had suppressed over the last several months. I wrote down all the memories and whatever thoughts and feelings came to mind, filling pages with it all.

Finally when the last email was deleted, I knew letting this junk go could be accomplished with one simple yet hard task. I went to Mister E's house for his assistance in completing my objective. I read aloud the venting I had written down from the day so that I could admit to myself the truth and pain of those memories. Mister E quietly listened as I let everything melt away, and when all was done, he helped me burn the last remnants of those memories and experiences.

At last, I was FREE!!! I was free from the pain, the memories, the emotion, the regret, the weight of carrying that junk around with me! I was no longer being strangled by what I couldn't change. I was free to be myself again, to move forward with my life, to discover what new paths are ahead. The smile on my face could not have been any bigger. I became a feather floating on a cloud of happiness. Life was my own again!

I can't tell you how wonderful it is to be rid of that junk. It is only through the Lord's mercy that I am free. It was His strength I needed to rely on before I could truly let go of what I held on to. It is amazing what the Lord can do with a simple girl like me, who makes mistakes and is far from perfect. Yet, He loves me and is there to help whenever I need Him and even when I feel I don't.

I love life, don't you?